The Thirty-Something Syndrome and it's impact on girls like me

For a few years now, I've been deeply discouraged by the obviously unhappy thirty-something year old women in my life who have missed every opportunity to love and mentor me through the years I've needed them most. My emotions have ranged from discouragement to frustration to anger to just plain old feeling sorry for them, because their actions and attitude towards me have made their own unhappiness obvious.

It wasn't until I was surrounded by Godly, nurturing women of this same age group who proved my encompassing view of them wrong that I realized that not all thirty-something year old's have this bad attitude. What "bad attitude," you might ask? Well, I like to call it the thirty-something syndrome... you know, those girls who are miserable because they're really too old to dress like they're still 22, but too young to dress like a full-fledged middle aged woman... the girls who have so much regret from the mistakes they made in their twenties that they automatically hate (or resent) any girl in their twenties who is actually living for Christ and trying to do all the right things and stay in the center of His will... those girls who are so unhappy with where they are and the choices they've made that they would secretly rather watch you fall on your face than accomplish your dreams.... those girls. The girls with the thirty-something syndrome.

I'm not sure what the most common cause of this is, but I know that jealousy, insecurity, and unhappiness are all factors. The saddest part of it all is that most women falling into this trap are far more beautiful than they realize, creative and smart, and could have a huge, lasting impact on the lives of girls like me if they would just set aside their poor attitudes and embrace the opportunity to make a difference.

Well, my experience with women like this and then, later, the women who proved to me that they aren't all like that has taught me a few things:
1. Never miss an opportunity to mentor a younger girl. You've been there, you understand, so instead of resenting them for being successful and striving to live for the Lord, embrace them, nurture them, and show them what genuine love feels like.

2. Go deeper than surface level. If you don't give someone a chance and try to get to know their heart, you can't truly understand them.

3. Being surrounded by Godly women in their 30's is one of the best things a twenty-something year old girl can do.

As I prepare for and plan a wedding, apply for jobs, and prepare to be the Godly wife Jesus has called me to be, there is nothing sweeter than learning from these women who have been there and want the best for me. Watching the way they love their husbands, watching the things they've taught their children, watching the way they invest their time and energy... it's been one of the sweetest gifts. That's the kind of woman I want to become.

Thank you to the women who have loved me, encouraged me, and taught me what it means to be a woman of God!

Freedom

Within the last 3 weeks, I graduated from college, started my job, one of my best friends got married, I watched my cousin graduate from dental hygiene school, and I adopted a dog... all the while visiting my grandma in the nursing home, participating in all my church's activities, helping my fiance look for a house and preparing for a huge yard sale. Not to mention making hundreds of bracelets in an effort to raise money for our upcoming mission trip to Haiti. Happy and stressed and busy and overwhelmed and blessed beyond measure... "Too blessed to be stressed," that's for sure. Wow. When did life become such a roller coaster? I can be emotional depending on the situation, but I swear these last few months I've been on top of the world one minute and crying the next. I guess that's what happens when you cram what should be about 5 years of excitement into a few months.

Isn't it funny how we get so stressed out about these kinds of things, though? I mean, when I leave for Haiti, I have full confidence that Jesus is going to wrap His arms around me, protect me, and use me just like He did last time. There's just not a sliver of doubt in my mind. But, when I think about Grayson and I finding a house in the short amount of time we have to do it, it scares me to death. Why is that? Jesus already has our little house picked out. He knows what kind of counter tops and curtains and floors it has, He knows what the backyard is like, and He even knows what flowers we'll plant in the front yard. So, in the midst of the stress of not knowing... I'd like to declare FREEDOM. Freedom in Christ to not know. Freedom in Christ to have faith in His goodness, in His unwavering faithfulness, in His perfect timing and plan for our lives. When you force yourself to take a step back, release the white-knuckled grip of control you [almost always unsuccessfully] have of your own life, and let the Lord lead you, you will experience a freedom like you have never had before. We serve a good God, a loving Father, and His plan is perfect (even when we don't understand it). Declare freedom in Him today, friends.

Renmen Abonde

Renmen Abonde, creole for "love abounds," is the name I've finally chosen for my bracelets.

It's taken me quite a while to decide on a name, because I didn't want a name that pointed to any good I'm doing by making them, but rather point to the love of Jesus, because without Him none of this would be possible.

When I think about the way Jesus has taken some wire and a few beads and transformed them into something so beautiful, it gives me goosebumps. Isn't it funny how He can take simple things and transform them into awesome opportunities to share our faith? Making these bracelets has been such an adventure, full of every emotion wrapped into one. How do you start something like this with no money? I found out first hand that the answer to that question is faith. Trusting that the Lord would honor my efforts for Him, I jumped in head first with this attempt to raise money for my upcoming mission trip to Jacmel, Haiti. Since then, I've seen the Lord work in my life in the most profound way and I know that it's only a glimpse of the goodness He will reveal during my time in Haiti.

So many people have answered the call that Jesus has placed on their lives, buying bracelets and giving far more than asked of them in return. There aren't words to describe the gratitude I have for their support, encouragement and generosity.

My heart behind these bracelets is to connect women all across the world in Christ. Each of these bracelets are tangible reminders of the love that abounds across the deepest waters, uniting his daughters through the love that He so freely gives.

Thank you, Jesus. Your love abounds.

Take Heart

These last few months, The Lord has really been working on my heart. He used this adorable little boutique, some wire, and a few beads to totally wreck my heart, grow my love for the Haitian people, and learn to wholly place my trust in Him. After making my bracelets for just a little over a month, I've already raised more than half of what I need to go back to Haiti in August, and last week, after praying diligently that the Lord would continue to open doors and provide new opportunities for this effort to grow, I ran into my friend, Emma, in the library, who suggested I take my bracelets to the boutique where she works in Blowing Rock. Today, I walked in here with no idea what to expect and left with my heart so full I thought it might explode. Not only did Sheri, the owner of Take Heart, purchase my bracelets, but she also blessed my heart in the most precious way with encouragement, Godly advice, inspiration, and a challenge to dream bigger than I even thought possible. Why have I been limiting what I thought God could do in my life? He made it so clear to me today that He has big, big things in store for me if I'll just dream a little bigger, sparkle a little brighter, and fall a little more In love with Him || Jesus, it's all Jesus.

Three Easters

It's hard to believe that three Easters have gone by since this handsome man first asked me to do life with him. So much has changed since then, and we have overcome more obstacles than we can count. We've laughed together, cried together, challenged each other, and grown in ways that could only come from Jesus. 

Homemade Easter Egg Dye

Every year, it seems like the quality of store-bought Easter egg dye gets worse and worse. This year, we ran out at the last minute to buy a box of Easter egg dye, only to get home and realize that only 3 of the 6 tablets that the box advertised were actually included and they had melted somewhere along the way and the colors were all mixed together. Rather than getting out again in the rain to hunt down another mediocre box of egg dye, we decided to get a little creative. After mixing a few different concoctions to find the perfect homemade dye, we finally found a way to get eggs prettier than any box dye could provide.

Using a generous amount of Wilton icing coloring, a cup of water and one teaspoon of white vinegar, we dipped our eggs in these homemade colors and they came out completely streak and spot free, with beautiful colors that we had much more control over than boxed dye. 

 And voila! They turned out absolutely beautiful! In fact, they may be my favorite ones we've ever done. Any who would've thought, the secret to beautiful, streak-free eggs was right inside our kitchen cabinets the whole time!

The finish line

As I eagerly approach graduation, assignments are piling up and I am more overwhelmed than I've ever been. Senior portfolios, group projects, and final photography assignments take up every second of my time and I feel like I've been treading water just to keep from drowning in a sea called college. Where is the end of this tunnel? Will I ever be finished?

In search of some encouragement, I read 2 Timothy 4:7, which says, "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." I know that the Lord will only bless my perseverance and diligence, so no matter how hard it gets, I accept the challenge of pushing through these last few weeks and finishing strong. 

Fight to the finish with me, sweet friends. Wherever you are, whatever you're facing, the Lord is there with you, walking right beside you, and He can't wait to see you victoriously celebrating at the end of whatever tunnel you might be going through.