This past weekend, Gray took me on a little trip down memory lane. We went to his high school and walked onto the football field, where he practically lived for four solid years. Because I went to a private, Christian school, I missed a lot of things that I would've been able to experience had I gone to a big, public school like his with a football team. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't trade anything in the world for my Christian education and there's not a shadow of a doubt in my mind that it helped make me who I am today, but I think there will always be a part of me that wonders how my life would've been different had I grown up with Grayson, gone to high school with him, and been there, cheering on the sidelines as he played football.
I cheered in middle and high school, however, cheering for basketball and cheering for high school are very different. As I walked onto that field with him, I could almost see myself, in a uniform I held to practically a standard of gold, cheering my little heart out. What if we had met in high school? What if we'd chosen where to go to college together? Although he would've been two years ahead of me, it could've worked, right?
I don't know why, but for some reason, ever since he took me there and shared that sacred little window of his past with me, I can't seem to get these "what if?" feelings out of my mind. There's no such thing as "what if," really. You can't go back in time, and even if you could, things probably wouldn't go the way you think they should have. So, I just have to tell myself that we met at the perfect time, whether I wish he was my high-school-sweetheart, or not. He's my sweetheart now, and that's all that matters.
Sometimes it's easy to get caught up in wishing things had gone a different way in your life, but don't empty today of its joy. Be thankful for the here and now and know that God's plan and His timing are perfect.
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